The House on the Hill
by Yoshi with a Moustache
Summary: Trapped at the Princess's cabin, Mario and friends are struggling to survive after they realize something- or someone is picking them off one by one. At their wits end they must find out what is going on before they're all dead.
1. The House on the Hill

Characters Alive: Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Rosalina, Toad, Toadette, Yoshi, Birdo, Bowser, Wario, Waluigi, Mona, Pauline.

Characters Dead: None.

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Do you ever get that funny feeling in the pit of your stomach? You know that feeling you get when you're watching a B-rated horror movie and there's always that one really stupid girl who always seems to call down the stairs, "Is anybody down there?" As if the killer is going to answer her. When she hears no answer she starts walking down the stairs and you just want to scream, "No you idiot don't do that! You're going to die!" But she still keeps going despite your protests and walks into her intimate and bloody death.

Do you ever get that feeling in real life? That feeling you get when you want to scream at a character in a movie but instead it's yourself? You want to shake yourself by the shoulders and yell, "What the hell are you doing? Have you lost your bloody mind?!" You want to run to the hills. Hide under your blanket. Slap yourself silly to try and knock some sense into yourself. But you still keep going despite your inner protests. That kind of feeling?

Do you ever imagine yourself as a character in a horror movie? You'd be the smart character who'd know they were in a horror movie. Right? You'd know because they're always set in creepy places like an abandoned hospitals or an old house. You'd be smart and turn around and leave because you'd sense something was wrong. And even if you didn't leave you'd know what to do at all times. You'd be nice to the creepy relative that randomly just showed up that everyone else seemingly hates. You'd make sure to confiscate all the knives and other murderous weapons as soon as trouble arises. You'd avoid stairs and windows, go everywhere in pairs, be able to fight for hours on end and not get tired.

But what if the killer wasn't who you thought it was. What if they were an old friend? Your best friend? Your sibling? Your lover? What if the person who was causing you, and so many others, so much pain was the person you could never fathom. And when it's your time for them to come and harm you it pains you to see them this way. You guys have so many memories together. How could they do this to you? You'd imagine yourself growing old and having a fruitful life, not dying young and unfulfilled. You haven't even been to a different kingdom for God's sake! Why would they do this to you? How could they be so sick and twisted to even think to do something like this? You've done everything right and you're still going to die a painful and unglamorous death. I guess that's what strikes fear into you. What's scarier than doing everything in vain and still staring straight into the futile eyes of death?

What's scarier than doing everything you can yet still staring death in the eyes?

The House on the Hill

Day One

2:19pm

The Princess had a knack for baking. When she had a day off from her royal duties she liked to indulge her hobby. She would bake anything from pies to snickerdoodles to lava cakes. It was a hobby that few knew she had. And in that old cabin on the top of Tall, Tall Mountain the Princess was baking to her hearts desire. She was so excited to finally have a break that she had invited all her friends to spend a weekend with her at her great-great-great grandmother's cabin.

She may have gone overboard in baking treats for her friends though. She had baked everyone either a cake or pie, and two dozen cookies each. She was hoping her friends wouldn't mind. It was the thought that counts right? Her nerves were put on edge when she heard someone knock on the door. What if they didn't like all the baked goods?

"Coming," the Princess called out in a sing song voice.

She ran through the house to reach the door and felt her heart catch in her throat when she saw who it was. It was Mario. The plumber she had crushed on since she was a kid. She remembered when he and his brother had first started apprenticing their father, the Castle maintenance plumber. She had befriended them because she often got lonely being the only child in the castle and they were there often enough. She had become smitten with Mario after little time spent together. Sure Luigi was taller and some would say better looking but she had found something charming behind the baby hairs that were forming a moustache. Mario was oblivious though and could never quite catch her drift. Peach was determined to change that this weekend. She was young, in love, and determined.

Realizing she had just been standing in front of the door in a daze the Princess flung the door open with such force that the hinges bent causing it to squeak. She was face to face with Mario now. She felt very underdressed in that moment. She wasn't in any of her usual royal garb and she was quite certain she had flour on her face. She could feel her cheeks start to burn.

"Uhh, hi Peach." Mario said, taking a small step back. The Princess could tell he felt awkward.

"Hi Mario!" She said a little too enthusiastically. "Come in please. Let me take your bags."

"No-no. I can handle my bags." Mario chuckled, heaving his bag onto his shoulder.

They stepped inside and shut the door, which squealed loudly the whole time. Mario took the whole place in. Dust covered furniture, cobwebs in all the books and crannies, a tv that looked like it was from the Stone Age. It looked as if it could pass as a haunted house. Peach could sense Mario was feeling tense and said, "It's a bit of a fixer-upper. It was my great-great-great-grandmothers before she married into the Toadstool family."

"Yeah," he agreed, "it sure does smell good though."

The Princess smiled fondly. Mario's love for food sure hadn't changed. "I've been baking. Come and try some."

And so they ate scones, and drank camomile tea-well the Princess drank tea. Mario drank his coffee he had bought from a shop on his way. The reconciled and talked as if they had lost no time between them at all, like old friends should be able to. Soon there was another knock at the door announcing the arrival of more guests and the house slowly was filled with guests and laughter and recollections of fond memories they had shared together.

After everyone had arrived, with some help, the Princess had prepared a large dinner for everyone to enjoy together. Standing at the head of the table, the Princess wanted to make an announcement before everyone could eat. "Attention everybody. I would like to make an announcement. I would just like to thank everybody for coming. It means a lot to me. I know nothing is going to go wrong this weekend. I think we're going to have so much fun that we'll never want to leave."


	2. Dress Shoes on Marble Tile

Characters Alive: Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Rosalina, Toad, Toadette, Yoshi, Birdo, Bowser, Wario, Waluigi, Mona, Pauline.  
Characters Dead: None

Dress Shoes on Marble Tile

Day One

9:43pm

Crowded into the living room of the cabin, full from dinner, all the twenty-somethings were conversing.

"How have you been Toadette? I haven't seen you since high school." Empress Rosalina, leader of the Cosmo Kingdom, the farthest north kingdom of the planet, asked.

Toadette smiled, tugging at her hijab slightly. "I've been doing good. Life has been a little bit hectic lately since I started working full time again. The kids don't like staying with Toad's parents so much. Toadbert is such a mama's boy still."

"I'm glad to hear that Toadette. I'm so happy that you and Toad are doing so well. He's going back to nursing school again, I hear?"

"He is starting in the fall again. He's so excited. But enough talk of me, I've heard so much of you from the news." Toadette laughed pompously.

Rosalina felt the back of her neck start to burn. She had been a big figure in the gossip world lately. Of course the news didn't care about her kingdom's military accomplishments, or how she had diffused a three centuries old tension- on the verge of war, between her kingdom and Isle Delfino. The tabloids only cared about the _alleged_ affair between herself and Luigi. The articles would tell about how one of Rosalina's stewards-who had since been removed from her staff, caught them entangled under the sheets. It would go on to say how they had forced the steward to absolute secrecy or else he taken out.

"Yes, I've heard so much about me from the news too. Stuff I didn't even know," Rosalina laughed- hiding all the hesitancy in her voice, "and of course they never even think to mention how I've recently become a General either. So rude."

Luigi- who had been eavesdropping on the ladies conversations, sat recollecting the past year's events. They had come to find each other during times of trouble. Rosalina- in the middle of her Peace Treaty Agreement with Isle Defino. Luigi- finally breaking free of the gang boss dubbed King Boo, taking nothing but his love for heroin with him. His stomach lurched at the memories. The lies he had to tell to Daisy about how he got those new track marks. 'Bug bites,' he would say. The lies he had to tell to the gang about how he looked eerily similar to the Princess's boyfriend. 'Merely a coincidence,' he would say. When him and Rosalina finally found each other they saw something in each other that no one else could. They were two people who were so broken that when they came together they formed one non-broken heart. Their affair wasn't a love at first sight ordeal though. It started slowly, with a drink together at a Royal gala. Slowly it progressed into something more scandalous. The tea parties turned into dinner dates which turned into something more than they ever could have imagined. The night that when Lumalee walked in on them changed everything. And sure enough no sooner than a week later they were the talk of the Kingdoms. The accusations were true- give or take a few facts, but Rosalina and Luigi had decided to deny everything. Deeming it would be better for themselves that way. Rosalina could continue being a respected leader, and Luigi could save his relationship with Daisy. Deciding to quit seeing each other romantically took a toll on the pair. The demise of their dalliance led them to distance themselves, which ultimately led them to quit seeing each other all together.

Daisy- who had been leaning on Luigi, could sense his discomfort, picking up on only the tail end of Rosalina and Toadette's conversation. "Hey," she cooed, turning so she was facing Luigi, "don't listen to them. I still don't know how the media comes up with all that stuff. It's absurd!"

Luigi squeezed Daisy's hand. He felt almost criminal lying to her. She poured all her love unto him, but he felt as if he could quite reciprocate anymore. He remembered the day Rosalina made the first public announcement since the day the article went public. She had waited and hoped that the drama would quiet, but the paparazzi ate up the inattention, causing them all the more attention. She had prepared a speech that drew spectators from all over her own kingdom, and then some. She was calm and collected the day of the deliverance. She stood tall on her palace steps as she spoke to a nation.

"There has been recent assumptions about mine and Mr. Luigi Mario's relations. I am here to put these rumors to rest. Our relationship is purely professional and nothing more. Thank you for your time."

She retreated up the palace steps. Locking herself in her bedroom- like a hormonal teenager, she did a lot of thinking- and crying. So much crying. She cried until her eyes were puffy and she was out of breath. And then she cried some more. Rosalina knew she shouldn't have been crying over something so juvenile as a boy, but it seemed that they understood each other so. Around him, in a world where she had to be seen as a solid brick wall, she was allowed to crumble.

Luigi did a lot of thinking- and or crying, in the days following the speech. Of course he couldn't break so easily in front of Daisy as to not raise suspicions. He wanted more than anything in the world than to scream, and cry, and above all he wanted to relapse- spending countless nights staring at the ceiling in a cold sweat, trying to ignore the ever growing desire that made his entire body ache. But he couldn't falter. He could only smile and act like he didn't have a care in the world.

"Hey!" Daisy squeezed Luigi's hands hard, "I told you not to think about it."

"I wasn't," Luigi lied, "The Princess's meal was just so good. It's making me sleepy. Hahah!"

"Good, now go get me a drink please."

The high pitch of Luigi's laugh raised suspicions in Daisy, but she brushed it off. Daisy knew that Luigi would never betray her like that. When she had learned of the _alleged_ affair she was heartbroken. The thought of Luigi laying with another woman- giving all his love to another woman, made Daisy furious. She threw all of his clothes out her bedroom window, watching them flutter down to the castle garden. Landing in the cactus garden, some in the peacock enclosure, others in the koi pond. She burned his books next, tearing each page out one at a time; when she was done ashes had blackened her hands, and tainted the white marble tiles of the foyer. Then, in realization of her actions, she wept. What had she done? She was so sure Luigi was going to leave her that she couldn't calm down until he rocked her back and forth, and assured her that he wasn't going to. Then she started apologizing. She felt like she had apologized a million times. She promised to replace all his books and more- buy him a whole library full. She wanted to make everything right again. Luigi declined her offers, telling her that it was okay. He continued living as if nothing had ever happened.

Daisy almost felt bad as she watched Luigi fuss over her drink in the kitchen. She should be doing that for him. He did know how to mix it just right though. Waiting for Luigi's return Daisy watched and listened to the merry laughter and tales that filled the room. It seemed like just yesterday's they were all just children running wildly through the Princess's ballroom whilst their parents talked business in the maps room. It was hard to believe that they now performing their parent's duties, something they once claimed to be so _incredibly_ boring.

"Here love," Luigi said, handing her a candy coloured drink. Just the way she liked it.

She threw her arms around him in thanks as she ate the decorative cherry, "oh thank you Boo-Boo."

From across the room they heard a distinctive chuckle that belonged to none other than Yoshi. Mario and Luigi's childhood best friend, the long haired entrepreneur lounged with his arm slung around Birdo. His cheeks were red with the happy glow of intoxication, as he had finished one too many drinks that night.

" _Whacha_!" Yoshi mocked, "whipped much? Weeg?"

With little hesitancy Luigi flipped him off, "Birdo has you so wrapped around her finger you can't say anything."

They both threw their heads back in laughter. "What can I say," Yoshi said, "I'm a man of few desires."

"Hey remember that time in highschool," Luigi started.

"At that party?" Yoshi asked, sensing where this story was going.

"With those twins,"

"In the back of the Subaru,"

The boys laughed at their fond memory. All the while Daisy failed to notice her grip on her glass had tightened to the point that her knuckles were white. Ever since the incident Daisy never felt up to parr. She was inadequate and weak. She didn't like to think about it, but if the accusations were true, what did Rosalina have that she didn't? Even if she knew it wasn't true, thinking about it made Daisy's stomach turn.

"I'm going to bed," she told Luigi as she stood up.

"Is everything okay?" Luigi asked concernedly. She had barely touched her drink.

"Yeah," she smiled meekly, kissing him on the cheek, "my head just hurts."

"Do you want me to help you to bed?"

Daisy shook her head and bid herself goodnight, knowing tomorrow would bring a better day.

Day One

11:53pm

While most everyone had seen themselves to bed, there were a few who were still awake. They sat around, in the light the low burning fire, passing around a bottle of who knows what, letting the amber liquid take them elsewhere.

Without some much as a grimace Rosalina took a swig from the bottle, and handed it to Luigi on her right.

"You do this often Starr?" Bowser laughed, noticing Rosalina's uncharacteristic behaviour.

She arched her brow, knowing that the one and only King Bowser himself was only 14 when he took his first drink. It was some sort of political meeting, and while their parents were talking business and all the others were playing some sort of tag in the ballroom, being so much older than the others Bowser and Rosalina had grown accustomed to sneaking off to gossip and play, or in this instance drink a bottle of scotch Bowser had swiped from the bar. Rosalina herself was only 15 at the time and had little experience with alcohol, and the champagne she had had did not compare to the scotch. It didn't take more than a few sips before the redhead and the blonde were a mess of giggles, the alcohol taking quick effect on their small bodies. And now 14 years later, it seemed like they were doing the same thing. Passing around a bottle to be able to laugh at nothing in particular.

"How long do you think it'll be until Yoshi 'll start snoring?" Luigi asked the group, nodding to Yoshi who was sat deep in the couch with half lidded eyes.

"I'd give him about ten minutes,"

They all had a good chuckle before settling into a comfortable silence once again. They were all tired and were in desperate need of sleep, but fought against it with every part of their body. This was the thing they missed about being children. It was nice to be able to be with your friends without it being a political affair. It seemed like the only reason they ever saw one another anymore was because one of Bowser's states was on the verge of war with one of Daisy's, or there was an upcoming election in one of Rosalina's provinces. So they sat, enjoying each other's company, passing the bottle of Drambuie to the left.


End file.
